Saturday, November 14, 2015

Bicycle Microwave Oven

I want a bicycle with a microwave oven
And a waffle iron so I can fix breakfast for my friends.
I want a bicycle with a soft paisley footstool
Just in case I need to stretch out my thighs and my shins.
I think my bicycle could really use some dinosaur bones,
A mouthpiece from the trumpet of Louis Armstrong,
A couple of random office supplies from the desk of an Admin Assistant.
All this just to somehow help me pedal along.


I want a bicycle that knows that knowledge is power
And maybe I won’t have to pedal it with such great force.
I want a bicycle that I can ride in Utah
Where it’s illegal to fish from the back of a horse.
I want a bicycle with a pink flamingo on the handlebars
And hopefully the thing won’t be infested with ants.
I want a bicycle that knows how to wiggle its ears
And if I need it, give me a good kick in the seat of my pants.

I want a bicycle with a basket on the back for my cat
Made out of LEGO’s from that store in downtown Chicago.
I want a bicycle with a maid who will cook my waffles
And her husband will be the gardener - we’ll call him Santiago.
I want a bicycle with a huge, expansive front yard of Bermuda grass
Just so we can give Santiago something to do.
I want a bicycle that can walk up stairs and
While we’re at it, be able to walk up the down escalator too.

I want a bicycle that can catch foul balls at Minute Maid Park.
I want a bicycle that cleans itself at the end of each month.
I want a bicycle that can trim its own fingernails.
I want a bicycle that can think of a word that rhymes with “month.”
I want a bicycle that has dined with Jimmy Carter.
I want a bicycle that knows how to dream.
I want a bicycle that can walk like an Egyptian.
I want a bicycle that can make cookie dough ice cream.

I want a bicycle with a microwave oven
And a waffle iron so I can fix breakfast for my friends.
I want a bicycle with a soft paisley footstool
Just in case I need to stretch out my thighs and my shins.



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